Back home in Beit Meri, a small yet sophisticated town 20 minutes East of Beirut…. Feels pleasant; serene....
Papa... his genuine smile lights up a room just by being… That same smile welcomes me at the Rafiq Hariri International Airport. I am tired, jetlagged, and distracted, yet a glimpse of his emotion alleviates all… just for a moment… a moment I can only wish lasts a lifetime… We talk business, politics, economics, and cars; smiled, laughed, contemplated...
My mama… Tears in her eyes...tears of unreserved happiness and love… Tightly embracing her, my heart melts… Her touch so soft, so gentle, so maternal… Laying in bed, the crisp sheets warming up my skin… A sweet and familiar scent engulfing my body… The scent of mama…
Yet, my heart is distracted when it should not be… My soul consumed… consumed with the unknown…stranded in no man’s land ignoring what the past has taught… denying what the non-existent present possesses, and anxious at the fate my future holds…
Salty tears about to trickle down my face, unsure which emotion they are seeking to express… Hope they’ll be able to tell me one day…
Beautiful, rare, and fortunate, yet terrifying at the same time…
Cheers…
Off for a smoke or two…
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